Greedy Gobbler Redux: Now with MORE MEAT!

Well, hello again. Fancy seeing you here. You're terribly patient, and for that: THANK YOU.

I'm not going to go into the hows or whys re: my non-existent posts, except to say: Lack of inspiration. But now, the urge has returned. One including focus, always a helpful muse.

For the last three weeks, the Brit and I have been toying with a lower-carb diet. The reasons behind this are a mishmash of doctor warnings, extensive research, eye-opening science, and a last resort for me with a body that will not let go of weight when I stay on the Standard American Diet, no matter how little I eat or how much I exercise.

So far, I'm down 5.6 pounds. Hopefully a bit more, which I'll find out tomorrow on my weigh-in day. Even if half of it is water weight, this is nothing short of a miracle. Let's just say: underactive thyroid AND the start of insulin resistance = frustration.

My current food choices circle around meats, vegetables, cheese, a glass of wine, and nibbles of 75-82% dark chocolate. An occasional high-fiber bran cracker. Coffee, of course, but with the teeniest splash of cream -- it doesn't take much to get to the New York "dark" style coffee that I like. And if I'm being honest, a little bit of sucralose here and there when I need something sweet. I'm not thrilled about artificial sweeteners of any kind (even in my very occasional can of diet soda), but it's a way to have a little sweet, as opposed to an all-out NO for the foreseeable future.

Never give me an all-out NO. My brain will rebel in ways that I cannot physically control.

The first 36 hours were difficult, but not horrendous. I allowed myself a bite of banana here and half an apple there the first two days to allow my sugar levels to decrease gradually. The rest of the first week was a breeze. I felt great. I actually went to dance classes. And I lost almost four pounds.

Then Week Two. I'm not going to lie: it was horrific. Crankiness. Mean reds. Exhaustion like nothing I've ever experienced. The Brit's concern levels hit an all-time high -- he even suggested I call the pharmacy to make sure I didn't get a bad batch of thyroid medicine. By the end of the week, we decided a change of scene may help and scooted up to my (very generous) aunt and uncle's weekend home in Flagstaff. I'm still not sure if my symptoms were delayed hormonal/blood sugar adjustment, or just simple cabin fever and weariness of constant 110+ degree temperatures here in Phoenix. Probably both.

Regardless, four days in Flagstaff set me to rights -- and more importantly, I didn't give up on the diet. I even managed to squeeze in daily workouts while in the cool pines. We're now back home, finishing Week Three. My energy levels seem to have stabilized. I had a dinner party on Thursday night and managed a mostly low-carb menu that went over phenomenally well. The slight exception: grilled peaches with mascarpone, mint and toasted almonds for dessert -- and let me tell you, that was the MOST DELICIOUS half-a-peach EVER.

Tomorrow, the scale will tell me if I'm still on track to lose 1-2 pounds a week. But already: my jawline has more definition; my neck is tapering; and my upper abs are less poofy. I am not looking to be a sample size -- just back to my pre-thyroid problems "comfortable in my skin" weight. Regardless of weight, I also have the chance to step back from my genetic destiny and the type 2 diabetes hovering in my future. No sugar/grains (except on very special occasions) vs. pills and insulin...and then no sugar/grains EVER? I'll take the former, happily.

So for now: 30-35 grams of carbs per day. This allows me a cascade of vegetables, as well as the little treats (cheese, dark chocolate, wine) I need to stay sane. I look forward to the day I can add a bit of fruit back in, but that's temporarily on hold. And I'm OK with that sacrifice.

Tonight, we're having Chicken Puttanesca and a Raw Kale Salad (hold the bread crumbs). Coconut Popsicles for dessert -- if they turn out (I have high hopes and will share the recipe tomorrow if they do). Not bad for "diet food," eh?

Am I still a Greedy Gobbler? Absolutely! And I always will be. My new mission is to show it can be done -- happily and healthfully -- using me as the test object. Wish me luck. A little due karma. And lots of creamy treats along the way.

N.B.: At some point, I'll get more in-depth into the science and reasoning behind this decision. If you're curious now, however -- and want to be completely gobsmacked by what real research tells us about our bodies, as opposed to standard U.S. nutrition dogma -- I cannot recommend this book enough. Keep in mind that I am a public health advocate, with 12+ years of healthcare public relations under my belt -- and a master's degree in library/information science to boot. In other words, I can cut through bullshit and critically research the hell out of anything (and often do, much to my loved ones' collective annoyance). The Brit is a multi-degreed biomechanical engineer and very suspicious son-of-a-surgeon. We would not be making this change lightly, or without some serious, multi-layered scientific backup to the claims. Insulin, folks. It's almost all about insulin. And may actually be the core answer to our nation's (quite literal) ills. Time will tell.

Sunday Night Thoughts

I have the thought that, when people start a blog in this day and age, they have some thematic concept. An idea of time involved per week (if not per day) and a dedication to keeping this virtual thing alive.

I know. I give folks FAR too much credit. Including myself. Bear with me here.

Keeping a blog going -- even with the most lacksidaisical idea of theme -- is hard work. It nips at your back mind constantly. Because you (or I, as it were) feel like it should be a priority, or at least a commitment. To what, I don't know. But it's an exercise in discipline, right?

Clearly, Discipline and I have an ongoing standoff. Particularly when my day-to-day work has involved much writing as of late.

I feel I should have substance. Something that is useful, amusing, or at least enjoyable to my dozen or so readers. It's not enough to simply say: "Hey! I had a great Sunday! I started by going to a soon-to-be-favorite dive bar for a fabulous $3.50 breakfast. Then I played dress-up-doll with my sample size husband on his annual shopping trip. We followed that by picking up a dress or two for me, then had FAR too much fun refreshing ourselves at The Phoenician. We came home and made a fabulous grilled steak and veg salad for dinner while listening to old Casey Kasem Top 40 countdowns on our patio. Awesome!"

But that's about it. Life is really fun, even in its small moments. Something I have to remind myself constantly when some small niggling THING of no long-term consequence is bugging me at the back of my brain.

I asked this on my Twitter feed, but I ask you too: What do you do when your brain won't stop whirring? And for those of you with blogs, do you feel pressure to update on a regular basis, even if you feel your life is fun but...well, not necesssarily extraordinary? Or is it the perspective and -- dare I say it -- spin that make the regular bits shine?

Quickie: A Sweet Farewell

The Last Hurrah of the Spring Sweet Peas

Photo courtesy of Andrew Knowles

1-2-3 Project: Lavender Oil

I love creative projects, but I'm also not very good with choosing one hobby and sticking to it. I also have very little patience for dramatic learning curves (one of two major reasons why I've never quite understood knitting, crochet or how to play musical instruments), nor the space for a dedicated craft room.

Sound familiar? Is impatience a barrier to your creativity? Should it be? I say: "HELL, no!" I've learned to work around this temperament with "1-2-3 Projects," inspired little adventures that generally take few materials and less than an hour of hands-on work time, for the clever gal (or guy -- ain't no judgments here) on the go.

Our garden is a mishmash of planning and letting nature take its course. When we viewed what would become our house last October, the bricked-in garden beds were one of our first attractions. The layout is such that some beds receive direct sun, some mostly shade. That plus built-in drip irrigation sealed the deal -- here we would plan the herb, flower and vegetable garden of our apartment-bound Brooklyn dreams, desert conditions be damned!

But Arizona gardening will turn your head, your instincts, and -- if you're not careful -- your pocketbook inside out. In Phoenix, there are two short growing seasons each year. Very little of it (except citrus season, which falls between the growing seasons -- stay with me here) makes ANY logical sense to those from temperate zones. Planting calendars and charts are very popular in this town -- and you'll still scratch your head from time to time when you're doing things like...oh...planting tomatoes in January.

Being the impatient folks we are, we paid a gardener to help us clear our old beds, trim some plants, and get a few things going in our herb garden. In November. Which we found out is generally not the time to do such things as frost, believe it or not, is still very much a concern during desert winters.

This past winter turned particularly chilly, with two very late and extended frosts that led to many locals complaining about the bitter temperatures (boo hoo -- we got down to the upper 30s/lower 40s at night...I know, I know) and killed many hibiscus, bougainvillea, and other beautiful flowering plants around town. We ended up hacking back six gorgeous hibiscus bushes and all of the bougainvillea, most of which have rebounded in astonishing ways. Mere stumps only three months ago (and I truly gave them up for totally dead), the hibiscus around our house are perfect examples of Mother Nature gettin' down and kickin' some serious booty.

Despite tucking in the garden at night with blankies, sheets and lullabies, we lost quite a few plants. But we also discovered what would rebound and what you couldn't kill with a nuclear strike. It turns out Mediterranean plants and herbs (except basils) are very hardy -- and lucky for us, perfectly suited to the desert if you happen to have drip irrigation.

This spring -- and by "spring" we mean "February through April" out here -- four impressive, frost-resistant Spanish lavender bushes joined the blossoming orange trees and filled our backyard with color, scent and bees as other herbs started their season. Now at the end of May, most of the lavender heads have gone a greenish-gray, still full of scent but clearly at the end of their cycle and in desperate need of a trim to prevent them from crowding out the leafy herbs and tomatoes that are now coming into peak season.

Therefore, today's 1-2-3 Project: Lavender Oil! This one's a two-parter -- about 15 minutes in the first part and 15 minutes for the second part, about a week later.

You will need:

• About a quart of plain, good-for-your-skin oil. I grabbed a big bottle of sweet almond oil at the health food store and combined it with two smaller bottles of plain jojoba and Vitamin E oils I had sitting in the back of my medicine cabinet. Use up and combine what you have, so long as it isn't rancid. By the way, mineral ("baby") oil or anything else petroleum-based is not your best bet here.
• A clean, quart-sized mason jar, with tight fitting lid. By the way, I think mason jars are it. You can get a dozen of them for practically nothing at the grocery store and use them for so many things, including bargain drinking glasses. People will think you're totally hip and down-home when you're really just cheap and desperate for something to hold a large amount of booze for your pals. How about that!
• Two huge handfuls of fresh-cut lavender. Don't have lavender? What do you have in your garden that smells delicious? Mint? Rosemary? Sweet peas? Take a second and follow your instinct. Don't have a garden? How about using up those $4-per-package herbs that are wilting in your fridge and the cut flowers on your table? Recycling is fun.
• A high-speed blender or food processor. Or a really sharp knife and cutting surface will do.
• A chopstick or long-handled spoon, for stirring.
• A wire-mesh strainer, cheesecloth, a bowl, and a funnel, for final bottling.

1. Rinse your lavender (or herbs -- it's your show, tonight!) and gently pat dry so you don't crush the leaves and waste all the natural oils.
2. Throw the lavender into the blender or food processor with about 2/3 of the oil you plan to use. Whirr away until it's a fairly fragrant if ugly slurry. Alternatively, chop up your lavender into small bits, throw it in the jar with the oil, and proceed (FYI, you may need to let your oil sit longer than a week if you use this method).
3. Pour into your clean mason jar and add the remaining oil, making sure to leave about 1/4 inch of air at the top. Carefully stir to combine and tightly screw on the lid.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

1. Let sit in a cool, dark place for about a week -- or until the oil is the strength you like. Give it a little shake every day or so. Not strong enough? Let it sit (or add more lavender). Too strong? Hang on.*
2. Line your strainer with two layers of cheesecloth and place it over a bowl. Carefully pour the lavender oil slurry into the strainer and gently press it down to separate the oil from the lavender bits. You can also gather up the cheesecloth and wring it to get even more oil out. N.B.: you may want to do this in two batches.
3. Funnel the oil back into the rinsed out and dried mason jar, clean decorative bottles, or even the original bottles that the base oils came in (you saved those, right?) -- you can easily wash off the original stickers and slap on groovy new labels in their place. The perfect gift! Store in a cool, dark place to keep the oil fresh.

* = If the oil is too strong, dilute it with more of your base oil -- but go slow and add a bit (say a 1/4 cup) at a time, then let it sit for a day or two before deciding if it needs more dilution.

How can you use your lavender oil? All of the traditional bath and moisturizing uses, of course, but try these ideas:

• Place a few drops on a Kleenex or small cloth and tuck it into your bag or a drawer.
• Decant a tablespoon or so into a small bottle and take it with you on your next trip for a little pre-arrival pick-me-up.
• Fill a spray bottle about 1/8 full with the oil and the rest with distilled water, shake, and you have a refreshing linen and/or facial mist (keep it in the fridge during the summer -- chilly divinity!). You can also add a drop or two of your favorite essential oils to create custom blends.

How else would you use homemade lavender oil? I'd love to hear your ideas, too.